Sunday, January 6, 2008

Shot 16

16…Sigh! Every time I thought about the 16th shot this weekend for some reason I remembered my 16th birthday. I spent it at the beach as my birthday is in the middle of summer. I can even remember the bathing suit I wore that day. I was probably full of hope and had stars in my eyes. I am melancholy today. So much I could have done with my life and spent it waiting for something.

I’m not sure what I was waiting for now.

When I get through this treatment, no matter what, I am going to live my life very differently. I will take more chances, travel more and live my life for me because it didn’t help me following the straight and narrow. I thought I was safe by not taking any chances and staying cloistered with all the safe people in my life. Boy, was I self-mislead.

I'm pissed off! LOL

I survived Saturday and Sunday following the shot. I actually went for groceries on Saturday afternoon. The grocery trip is a milestone for someone who spent the first 15 weekends on treatment like a beached whale.

I expect I’ll get a bit wiped tomorrow as I usually do on Monday morning early. It’s the first day at my new job. I hope the brain fog doesn’t expose me as a fraud.

3 comments:

My Other Blog said...

Here's a treatment survival tip: if you give them an exact list, if they carry a cell phone to discuss possible substitions, if you're willing to accept anything less than perfection: men can go grocery shopping! I know, I know, I don't like anyone picking out my vegetables and meats, that's why even when I was so tired that i ordered groceries over the internet last year, I still went to the grocery store for those items. But, just like you lowered your standards a little, & let them decorate for Christmas, they can also bring food into the house.

Me said...

Congratulations on making it to week 16!

I've had difficulty with grocery shopping as well, so I feel you on that one. I never realized before tx that it was actually a chore!

someone said...

I do grocery shopping, I do cooking too.
I thought on my last treatment that I might live life a little bit differently, well apart from a different envirorment, I'm looking at pretty much the same old same old only for longer and a higher dosage.... but the best laid plans of mice and men... and now I'm thinking I shouldn't be posting this.It was going off the straight and narrow that got me the Hep but after doing this TX thang you do what makes you happy....it will pass....wrmest regards jb x